There is no way to think your way out of a broken heart. A broken heart severely compromises the mind. Your heart becomes a drain and the whirlpool of your thoughts continually swirls down the hole. You stand by, helplessly watching all of your plans, hopes, dreams, and self go round and round and down into oblivion. Any logical thought of how things will be fine in time just get sucked into the roiling waters and consumed by the abyss. The thoughts that pour from your mind are emotional bombs that go off and fill you with anger, doubt, sadness, despair, and numbness. Each bomb is equally devastating. While all that is going on, you have to go about your life.
You are not completely helpless as you go about life with a broken heart. Although not entirely helpless, you are also not in control. You may not be able to stop the thoughts, which will churn in repetitive tedium. You may not be able to defuse the bombs, which are strapped to the uncontrolled thoughts. You may not even be able to control how you go about your life. Things that need doing may remain undone. Things that shouldn’t be done are done. What you can do is try your best and observe the mayhem.
As you go about your life, you can recognize each emotion as it fills you. You can wash your dishes as you feel sad. You can mow the lawn as you feel angry. You can observe what bombs are attached to which thoughts. You can notice your thoughts go from blame to shame and down the drain. You can feel compassion for yourself, with or without feeling sorry for yourself. When you live with a broken heart, you are forced into a certain amount of mindfulness. Your mind is full of large thoughts and there is no way to see around them. By using the imposed mindfulness of heartbreak to practice willful mindfulness, you develop skills to handle the rest of life’s endless surprises.