Dealing With Your Mother

There is a little discussed, but powerful, mindfulness practice called Dealing with Your Mother. This is an especially important practice for those still living in the same house as their mothers. This practice is helpful for anybody at any age. When you have mastered this practice, you will be able to deal with everything else.

Our mothers have an important place in our lives. They can inspire intense love or intense hate and all the intense emotions in between. They are closely aligned with our egos because they were there when our egos were created. Intentionally and unintentionally, consciously and unconsciously, they can push all of our buttons. When our mothers are not around, we find other people to push those buttons, but nobody can do it quite like mom.

To practice dealing with your mother you have to pay special attention to your interactions with your mother and the emotions evoked in those interactions. Practice looking at the situation through your mother’s eyes. If your most basic assumption is that you love your mother, use that love to power your practice. If your mother suffers, connect with her suffering. When you see past your own suffering to the suffering of somebody that you love, you gain strength and courage.

It is helpful in Dealing with Your Mother to address the surface issues. After an incident occurs, talk to your friends and develop a strategy for the next time something like that happens. If you are prone to angry exchanges with your mother, focus on trying to stay with your anger without getting carried away by it. If you get carried away despite your strategy, wipe the slate clean and try again the next time. Your mother will still be there.

Dealing with Your Mother with mindfulness is a rich source of material for practice. Your mother helped create your ego and she can help you destroy it. To chip away at your ego it is often useful to find new and sincere ways to apologize. With consistent mindfulness practice, you can get beyond the surface issues and the habitual emotions and access the vast well of love that lies beneath. That love, when flowing freely, will power you through life. Thanks Mom.


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