Think about what you want most in the world. What is it that would make your life complete? What would bring you happiness? Unfortunately, wanting that is causing you pain.
What do you do with your want if you don’t want pain? You clearly don’t want pain. Unfortunately, not wanting something is also wanting something. Again, that leads to pain. Wanting and not wanting hurts when it is attached to an object. If you want love, that want causes you pain. If you don’t want to be bothered that not wanting causes you pain. You are not so bothered by being bothered as much as not wanting to be bothered.
So how do you avoid wanting or not wanting? Good question. How do you avoid pain? Good question. You don’t avoid pain. You don’t avoid wanting and not wanting. All you can do is notice it all. Notice what you want and notice how wanting feels. Notice what you don’t want and see how that feels. Notice your pain and see where it comes from. This is all you can do.
When you don’t concern yourself with wanting and not wanting, all that is left is contentment. What more could you want?