All we ever want is to be distracted. If you are content just being in the moment, you will not seek distraction. You may feel love, but you won’t long for love. Longing for love is wishing for a distraction. Without the distraction you just feel you. That feeling of you may feel like loneliness, so you dream up another person to come and distract you. You imagine that person will adore you and you will adore them. You will snuggle and cuddle and laugh and play. What a wonderful distraction that fantasy is. What a wonderful distraction that person would provide.
As you get into a relationship you get caught up in the distraction and it becomes a part of you. It may not go as you hoped and instead of becoming a pleasant distraction, it becomes a source of pain. You soon need a distraction from your distraction.
Hopes, dreams and plans, provide all kinds of distractions. Imagining better circumstances is a regular occupation. Striving is inviting distraction. To stop inviting distraction, you don’t need to stop striving, you need to be present. If you recognize when you are seeking distraction, you can be present in that distraction and it becomes your focus. When you give up on the idea that there is a better time than now, you stop reaching for distractions, you contentedly engage opportunities.